Celebrate

Lately, everything calls for a celebration. Spring has arrived in Oregon, and the sunshine and flowers are welcome sights. I completed my taxes early (by myself!), and got a surprise refund. And most significantly, I said goodbye to a job I didn't love and get to move to a career that excites me. It's been a good week.

My running schedule has also hit a nice rhythm. Longer days have allowed me to switch to evening runs, which are much more relaxing. Through the winter, I woke up early and ran before work. This was the only way to run in any sunlight, but the strict deadline of having someplace to be by 9:00 a.m. often caused me to cut a run short. Evening runs, however, are free. My responsibilities have been completed, and I have nowhere else to be. I run as I want. The only deadline is the sunset, which is getting later by the day. 

Running in the evenings has reminded me why I loved running so much in the first place: it's fun. It's really fun, actually. Running gives me a reason to be outside, to embrace sunshine or rain, to eat better, to drink more water, to sleep when I'm tired, to wave hello to neighbors walking their dogs, to be motivated by runners who pass me, to set goals and meet them. Running makes my brain feel clear and my body feel cleansed. Running makes me feel alive. Running makes me happy.

And that's worth celebrating. 

Agency

All things considered, there isn't much I can control. I have no say in the weather. I can't break up traffic jams. No one asks for my input on tax policies. 

This isn't the case when it comes to running. I do have control over my own body. I chose what I eat. I chose what I drink. I chose how to move, and how often. Running is up to me.

The past few weeks have been busy and stressful, and I've been feeling overwhelmed. Given how little control I have over outside factors, it's been even more important to hold on to what I can. When I leave the house with my running shoes, I control each step. I pick the course, I pick the distance. This level of authority is a rare luxury.

Some runs are amazing, and I feel strong and free. Other days I'm sluggish and slow. Neither of these results happens by chance. Successful runs are largely caused by the choices I've made, and I can turn around a poor run by making better choices tomorrow. 

When it comes to running, I have a choice. I have control. I have agency. And I love it.

Resolutions

I've never been much for New Year's resolutions. January 1 is an arbitrary date to make a life change, there's already so much pressure during the holidays, and surviving the winter is daunting enough as is. 

But that's not to say there isn't value in taking a step back. It's important to evaluate where you are, what could be better, and what needs to change. There is always room for improvement. 

Tomorrow is my birthday, so today seems as logical a time as ever to reflect on the past year.

27 started with running, but the running ended abruptly. I ran a half marathon in April, and almost immediately after that I packed my boxes and followed my heart to Oregon. Previous posts have dug deeper into this, but running stopped being a priority for several months. Getting back in a healthy routine has been a slow and difficult process. Worthwhile, of course, but difficult.

So here are my hopes for 28: 
To run with strength and confidence. 
To run my own race, regardless of who else is with me. 
To focus on what my body is capable of and not what it looks like. 
To stop when it hurts, but push when I'm tired.
To finish what I start. Even when it's raining.
To train smartly and safely. 
To be healthy. 
To be happy.
To be well.

Here's to a great year.